lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Randomize
