So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
the raccoons are back...
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