Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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