Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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