So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
