saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
