Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
