Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
