Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Randomize
