I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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