The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize