That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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