There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Randomize
