fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Please, let me fuck your mom
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
is wine microwaveable?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
