Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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