Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Randomize
