I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
