For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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