and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
