Fine. I'll sleep in my office
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
