one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
smell my finger.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Randomize
