East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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