Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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