I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
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I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
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Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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