Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize
