i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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