your thong is hanging out like whoa
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
