haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
