On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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