Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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