two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Text me some of your sweat
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
