Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
