I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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