Well douche your snatch and let's go!
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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