I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
