Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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