OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
