ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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