thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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