The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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