Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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