You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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