if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
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I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
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She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
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