Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
