That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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