i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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