idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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