As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize