I am in a vortex of obligation.
Do vagina's smell?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Randomize
