yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
